Speedy carlito
I've noticed that everything in Singapore is fast--the buses, the people, the food, the escalators. I won't be surprised if even sex is fast. But more importantly the god-damned cockroaches are fast!
Early this morning while I was taking a piss, half-awake and groggy, something zoomed past my feet.
HOLY SHIT! WHAT WAS THAT?!! I think it was a beetle! CRAP! How do you kill a beetle? Where the hell did this fucking son of a bitch come from?!!
By this time I was already 3 quarters awake. Upon closer inspection, I realized it was a freaking cockroach (who from this point on shall be known as speedy carlito). It sure looked different from the cockroaches we have in the Philippines.
So I took off my left slipper and started to slap speedy carlito. Boy he was fast, I couldn't get him. He climbed up the glass shower door and I gave him a soft tap. He fell and ran towards the door. It was now or never.
With all my might I whacked at speedy carlito and caught his lower half. Hooray! He was now crawling with his front feet(?). The bugger was half dead. But he was still moving fast. So I gave him another tap. Some of his feet were now twitching, 3 quarters dead.
I got a handful of 2-ply (hehe) tissue paper and tried to grab speedy carlito's right feeler (or is it antenna). But I couldn't get hold of it! It was still moving fast. I think it took me about a minute or more to finally grab one.
I then dropped speedy carlito in the bowl. He was trying to swim. Normally, I would pour hot water or some shampoo before flushing but I was eager to go back to bed so I just flushed the toilet bowl.
Then I realized that speedy carlito might survive and come back someday. But I didn't give a rat's ass. I went back to bed and checked my phone. She didn't text =( I dozed off after a few seconds.
Hehehe
What a charming little story. And yes, speedy carlito probably survived.
I once flushed a half-flattened cockroach down the toilet. When I came back a few hours later, I found it swimming and trying to climb out. Those buggers are indestructible, I tell you.
carlito cool
the intercontinental champion
Carlito Singaporean Cool.
Carlito Singaporean Cool. That's cool. Hehe =)
Roaches
They can survive a nuclear blast! They can even digest hair! They could outlast all of us. They're actually the dominant specie of the planet!
She
You mentioned 'she' again. Btw, you're story about the cockroach creeps me out. Hehe
She
Yeah.. she's all I think about.. *sigh*
Tsk tsk tsk
Hurry back home so you could see her again! Hahaha! Invite her to join Chicken Mafia so she could read about your weird experiences in Sing.
Entertaining story
That's so much trouble for a single cockroach... So Singaporean roaches are more agile eh?
Entertaining story... but you ended with an Oprah moment. Tsk! You're a die-hard Oprah fan and you just don't know it yet!
Yeah, what's with the Oprah ending?
Why can't you end your entries with an insult to a major religion like everyone else here does?
Hahaha!
I'm guilty! Mwehehehe!
Cease the Oprah Endings
Chinesemafia should try to post an entry without mentioning "She" ... or try to bang that skull of yours, so you'll wake up the next day not knowing her at all. "She" might not be worth of your time anyway.
Hehehe
Chinesemafia is a fool for Oprah-styled love.
What do you say, Chinesemafia? Want to try banging your skull? That sounds fun. Be sure to blog about it.
OR
Try banging something else... that ougth to be fun!
Hmmm..
A tree?
Well
Maybe if you knew her then you wouldn't say something like that.ü
Hmmm...
I see smoke...
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