Jesus miracle beam ray machine
Kids, you're looking at the device that will put an end to all the diseases in the world!
On the outside, it doesn't look too impressive. It's an ugly metal box with a screen plus a few buttons and knobs. It comes with a standard PC keyboard--well, standard except that there is only one big Delete key where separate Insert and Delete keys should be. And, interestingly, it saves data on a 3 1/2-inch diskette. Wow, really? People actually still use those? I haven't seen of one of those fossils for years.
But beneath the ordinary-looking shell lies extraordinary healing powers that no machine in history has even possessed. So what is this amazing contraption? As the pastor who showed me the device earlier today explained, it is a Rife beam ray machine.
Huh? What is a beam ray machine? The beam ray machine was derived from the works of mad scientist Royal Raymond Rife in the 1930s. Yes, the 1930s. The basic concept is that each type of disease-causing microbes oscillates at a specific frequency. By blasting those microbes with a sound wave of the proper frequency, we can make them explode the same way that the voice of Mariah Carey shatters glass. Bacteria ka-boom = disease cured. Yay! Makes sense? Yay!
OK, that's wonderful, but how do I know what frequency to use? Don't worry, my friend. The beam ray machine comes with a neat manual (see picture) containing the names of every disease that you can think of and the corresponding frequencies. By fiddling with the settings, you can use this machine to cure anything from migraine to cancer to AIDS! Just input the correct number and press Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Start!
Seriously, all this is starting to sound like a gigantic load of bullshit. Do you have any scientific proof? Peer reviews? Controlled clinical trials? Anything? Well, not really. But that's only because the technology has been suppressed for decades by evil pharmaceutical companies that control the FDA and the whole medical industry! The dog ate my homework Their goons burned down Mr. Rife's lab and destroyed all his notes containing the detailed results of his experiments! In fact, Mr. Rife was so devastated that he become an alcoholic and died of a drug overdose. Poor Mr. Rife! Pharmaceutical companies don't want you to have this miracle cure. They want to keep you sick so that you'll keep buying their drugs!
Wait a minute... if the beam ray machine can cure anything, why didn't Mr. Rife use it to treat his own alcoholism? .... Never mind, don't answer that.
I asked the pastor if he has had personal success with the device. He enthusiastically told me story after story of sick people getting better after he treated them with magic beam rays. Cool. I then asked if he had encountered instances where the device didn't work. After a bit of awkward silence, he admitted that yeah, it doesn't always work. Hmm....
Most sane rational people would see the whole thing, from the concept to the execution, for what it is--a laughable scam. So you would think that the good pastor who swears by the magical device is a total idiot. But the sad thing is that he's actually a well-educated guy... brilliant public speaker... definitely above average IQ.
It must be true that there's a sucker born every minute. Of course, it's hard to judge them. With enough effort, anyone can be deceived. This interesting podcast mentioned on Carnifex's blog illustrates how human perception can be easily manipulated. It's true... we humans are stupid stupid animals.
But to be fooled by the claim that a beeping and buzzing metal box can cure all diseases? Come on! Unfortunately, religious people, even the smarter ones, seem to be particularly susceptible to this kind of pseudoscience. Oh well, I guess that should come as no surprise. Think about it. If you can believe in a magical son of god who can heal the sick and perform miracles, it's probably not too much of a stretch to believe that a magical god machine can do the same, right? Right?
Anyway, to end this rant on a positive note... hey, good news for all you Catholics. You really don't have to use condoms! If you do catch nasty STDs, just come before the Jesus miracle beam ray machine and confess your sins, and you shall be healed.
Yay!
Yay!
My blog has been referenced! I want to thank my producer, my crew, my cat, Blog.com, my dad for he didn't know what a condom is and my mom for not educating him, what a condom is!
Tyranids may look unpleasant, but believe me, you don't want to let them out of your sight | http://carnifex.blog.com
Hehehe
Wouldn't it be nice if an Oscar winner gives the condom speech instead of the usual boring drivel....
i
sure hope the pastor is not thinkin on the lines of resonance, becuz if u used the same frequency u might double the bacteria, like the resonance effect.... the only way to cancel the virus is to use the opposite frequency!! gullible... ahem i mean GOOD ppl of the world !!
Did you sleep through your physics class? :-P
To shatter a piece of glass with sound, you need find its resonant frequency, then use a high-amplitude sound wave with the same frequency, not the "opposite frequency" (no such thing).
A sound wave at an object's resonant frequency will cause it to vibrate and, if the amplitude is high enough, break. The key here is amplitude, which is one of the reasons why the beam ray machine can't possibly work. Even assuming that the provided list of bacterial resonant frequencies is accurate (which is highly questionable), there's no way that the soft dull buzzes from the boombox pack enough energy to make all the bacteria go ka-boom.
AND if they do go ka-boom,
you can't guarantee that this supermagical device won't blow up your own cells. Yay, the best thing ever would be to cure a cold with this wonder of technology and blow up your fucking brain all over the place because you mistyped the frequency, hehehe :)
Tyranids may look unpleasant, but believe me, you don't want to let them out of your sight | http://carnifex.blog.com
That's right
The beam ray people seem to ignore the fact that we humans are composed of cells, many of which aren't really that different structurally from bacteria. If a "beam" is strong enough to kill bacteria, it will also be strong enough to at least severely damage the human cells around it. Oops.
i know wat u mean
u mean its natural frequency, resonance is caused by bombarding something with its natural frequency, causing two waves to overlap therefore amplifying the effect. wen i say opposite frequency, i meant wave with wavelength difference of 180 degrees, so the two waves can cancel each other out. =)
It doesn't
exactly work that way, but it's OK... this isn't a physics site anyway, hehe.
Uh....
Last time I checked it was called opposite phase, and opposite phase does not cancel a resonance effect - because resonance is not about adding two vibrations only ;)
* looks at the "who let the wise guy in" stares of other site members and runs away *
Tyranids may look unpleasant, but believe me, you don't want to let them out of your sight | http://carnifex.blog.com
Hey!
No physics on this site! Hehehe.
beam ray
hi everyone, does anyone know where i can get one of those machines?
If you live in the Philippines,
I can tell you where to get one. If not, you're on your own.
But why would you want one anyway? It's a scam.
Isn't it obvious?
To fool various idiots to pay him money to be cured by the miracle machine, JC. It's called a business plan!
Tyranids may look unpleasant, but believe me, you don't want to let them out of your sight | http://carnifex.blog.com
Hmm
I like the concept of this "business" thing you're talking about.
Screw you
This blog reminded me about the old good days I posted stuff too, so I had to update my blog. I hate you.
It's a good business model though.
Tyranids may look unpleasant, but believe me, you don't want to let them out of your sight | http://carnifex.blog.com
This is very funny - except
This is very funny - except for the fact that my mother-in-law is dying of cancer and sold her piano to buy one of these things for $7,000!!!!!
I'm sorry to hear that
Quacks and charlatans often take advantage of desperate people. They're shameless.
beam ray
Yes, I would like to know where to get one.
Rife
Rife was a selfless man who invented a machine that really does cure many diseases. You do have to know how to use it, and yes it does work.
The premise of this chicken website would claim that typewriters are no good because monkeys can't type Shakespeare!
A Rife machine was never meant to cure personality issues or mental illness. It was meant to destroy diseased cells, bacteria and parasites. It is very effective at that. Just like flying an airplane, you do have know a little about what you are doing.
Um, right
We should believe that Rife machines work because Anonymous Chicken said so--no need for evidence at all.
Well...
Rife does sound like life... of course its a letter away from Rifle, which you'd be virtually pointing at your head when you choose this over evidence-based medicine.
On a more serious note, even assuming that such a device doesn't work at all, it can still harm you by keeping your from proper treatment and wasting your resources. Case in point is a neighbor of mine who eventually had to have her toes amputated because she thought this stupid beam ray could cure the infection that was ravaging her poor diabetic feet. Not only did she had to have the amputation, by the time they decided to do it, she was a wreck. Too weak to even sit up, her legs badly atrophied and her blood pressure dangerously low.
Rife was a genius!
Your neighbor is stupid because she didn't know the right way to operate the miracle machine. If you know the right way, it works!
Too bad
Rife lost his life or we'd be good huh?
Dude,
you've got to let the Rife-life rhyme thing go. It's making me cringe :-P
You Don't Know Jack! Educate yourself...
The Beam Ray device, April 27, 2002
By A Customer who bought the book and machine.
I bought this video, along with Bare's book about how to build a beam ray device, supposedly like Rife's original device from the 30's. I was skeptical but actually ended up building the device. The first part of the video is fascinating. You are looking through a dark field microscope (which I wouldn't know from a telescope) at various micro-organisms being affected by the beam ray device. Mr. Bare gives a running commentary while the micro-organism are destroyed, each in a matter of minutes on your TV screen. If you are like me, it will be a really eerie experience to watch this "death to microbes" demonstration. My thoughts were along the lines of "If this thing was invented in the 30's and it can really do what I'm seeing on the screen, what happened? The most revolutionary medical device of the century, invented 70 years ago and I've never heard of it?"
I would suggest reading the book, "The Cancer Cure That Worked" by Barry Lynnes, before you watch the video, so that you have some idea of the background.
Briefly, a scientist named Royal Rife invented a microscope in the 20's that allowed him to see the world of the very small with magnification up to 8000X. A normal light microscope only goes to 1500X, allowing one to see bacteria, but nothing smaller. Rife's microscope allowed him to see viruses and a whole world while it was alive, unknown before that time and since. The modern electron microscope kills everything that it looks at, thus obviating much of the micro biological observations. With the microscope, Rife claimed to discover the virus that causes cancer. This lead him to his beam ray device, which was tested by him and 20 other doctors, under the auspices of USC, in 1934. Supposedly it was 100% effective at curing cancer, and was hailed across the country as the medical breakthrough of the 20th century, with doctors from the Mayo clinic, Northwestern University, and Stanford getting on the band wagon. Many years of lawsuits followed between the AMA and Rife's company ending with him a broken man and the microscope and beam ray device fading into obscurity. It's a great story.
When you watch these microbes being destroyed, you'll get the idea that this thing may actually work. If you have any vision at all, your skin will tingle. Mine sure did, and resulted in me building the device as Bare lays out in the second half of the video and in his book. The construction is well described and shown, but it is not an easy project for the unskilled. I am an electronics engineer, so it was easy for me. The devices can be bought completely assembled now, unlike 6 years ago when the video came out.
And read the testimonials here...
http://www.ultimatewellness.com.au/products.html12
Do you realize
how gullible you sound? Well, of course not.
"The magic microscope totally works because I saw a video! Lightsabers are totally real because I saw them in movies!"
Give me a break.
I can't be arsed to point out all of the stupidities.
However, I can mention some. Light microscopes can only go so far not because of limitations of our technologies, but because there is a hard physical limit on the size of things you can observe in a given wavelength and the only thing that could let you observe things at x8000 magnification is increasing the used wavelength well into ultraviolet and xray, which would simply irradiate most of the critters. Also, I doubt very much that the mister you claim to have seen stuff at that magnification could possibly see ultraviolet and xray.
It is well known that there is NO one reason to cancer. A cancer is an anomalous growth of cells that is caused by various mutations to their genetic code. Most of the times a cell that has it gene code deviate too much would die or be destroyed by the organism, however, in the case of cancer, the cells not only survive, they start to multiply like rabbits. What EXACTLY causes these mutations is totally case-by-case matter, it might be various virii, it might be radiation, it might be poisonous chemicals, it might be sun light, it might be a lot of things.
I won't go on debunking the rest of your tirade, but I really think that despite your education in electric engineering, which, by the way, doesn't give you any cred apart from talking about the internal circuitry of electric devices, so I don't think you should use it in online discussions, you should really refamiliarize yourself with some basic notions of optics, biology, medicine (esp. pathology) and wave mechanics. Until that time, I bid you adieu.
_____
My dead blog is dead since I hate blogging and I lead the most boring life ever.
Heh
I'm sure he's convinced now... not.
It is sad that the hope and kindness in the world has died.
I am not here to try to state that I am or am not a believer in the beam ray machine. I just want to share a story. A friend that I work with has a son that is dieing of cancer. He has had treatment at Hershey Medical Center, for the past four years. They were suppose to have got it all a year ago, and he was cancer free. What a joy and relieve to him and his family that was. Now, Two weeks ago, the young man developed a headache. He had a couple of tests, and then back to Hershey. The cancer is back, and this time it is on the brain. They operated on last fri, and got most of it and ran tests to find out what kind it was. Well, yesterday they found out that it is the aggressive kind and he is going to die. He came home today, with a drain tube in his head and a death sentence. There is nothing that the great medical field can do for him. This kinda makes me wonder, after sooooo many years of study and drug after drug. There is still no cure for cancer. We are evolving in leaps and bounds in the technology of about everything but curing illness. Is it a form of population control? One has to wonder. Back to the topic at hand. I today (for some reason unknown to me), heard of this machine. I called my friend and told him that a gentleman told me of this radio machine that cures cancer. At the begining of the day, I would have never thought that I would be deleivering such news. I kinda felt akward in calling him, but the happening seemed to be to perfect. I just happened to bring the story of his son, up in front of a person that is taking treatment from a Beam Ray machine. The odds of that are really slim. I just know that I pray this freakish sounding and somewhat foolish idea is for real... The boy just turned 18 and is kinda younger in mental age, but only because of the shelter, due to, his battle. He is a kind person and he is scarred to death!! His Dad don't know how to have "The Talk" with him. How would a person handle having to tell you child that he or she is going to die. You as a parent is suppose to take all the bad away and make the world a safe place. I don't care what some people think of this machine. I just hope it works!!! I think if the shoe was on the other foot, some Sarcastic Son of a Bitches would change their tune. Sorry about that, I just get tired of people's negativity. Some can explain "why not" all day long, and never say anything constructive. I just have a couple of questions, that I would love to have answers for. How can the brain study itself and still not know how it works? And, why can we as people fix and/or develop almost anything, but we cannot cure or maintain our own bodies? I believe that there is an answer out there for both of those questions, but if they were to be answered, the world would be quite packed to live in. It is convient for us to die, no matter what the age. Another thought: If electromagnetic engery can cause cancer cells to develop (for instance the higher number of people that live around high voltage and power plants). Then why, can't radio frequency fix it? If anyone argues or cuts up my two cents, so be it, I would expect it. Just keep a kind heart and a prayer for my friend's son. Thank You!!
Take care, and remember.
"Life is a continous mental and physical struggle for survival that undoubtabally ends up in death".
P.S. I know that my spelling and grammer suck, I spent enough time writing papers and such, that I figure if you can't get the jist of it, then the grammer and spelling really aint gonna help you much.
I don't mind the spelling and the grammar,
but dude, how about some paragraphs? :-P
Anyway, I get what you're trying to say, and I feel bad for your friend's son. But your rant about science and medicine is more emotional than rational, so I guess a reasonable debate isn't likely to happen here.
good one! I forgot to bring that into my defense.
Yea, you got me on that paragraph structure comment. Nice!! lol Correct, I don't keep up with the developments in science, as well as I once did. So, a debate would prob. be a waste of time, because my thoughts are basically emotion drivin, at least for now. Take Care, and keep your fingers crossed for 12-21-2012, this world could use a good cleansen!! haha
Hmm
I'm hoping for a pony, but a world cleansing would be okay too I guess.
Three words:
Paragraphs.
_____
My dead blog is dead since I hate blogging and I lead the most boring life ever.
One word
Syllables.
Zero words
....
It worked for me!
Dear Most Skeptical and Self Reclaimed Chicken Brain,
I used a Beam Ray machine and it dissolved an "Atypical gland" from my prostate. That was 2 years ago, and I've felt fine ever since.
Your hearsay of it's unfounded abilities to remove cancerous cells are ill stated. Until you, yourself, face the doomed feelings associated with the possibilities of cancer presents in your own body, you should refrain from commenting on what works and what doesn't work.
As of me, I stumbled across your website, and will just as quickly forget about it and your ravings...
Consider the unjust your are doing, and have a nice life...
Can your beam ray machine
fix your grammar? :-P
It's unfortunate that you'll never be able to read this response
But it's irresponsible claims like this that increases the likelihood of such feelings of doom to patients with cancer. They do not need false hopes. Sure, the beam ray might not actually do anything to hurt you directly, but time and money wasted are irretrievable, and indirectly hurts you by allowing your condition to progress without treatment.
And while this may be anecdotal evidence (and thus not worth that much), allow me to share, in case you find yourself stumbling back here, how a family friend of ours went to such treatment and ended up having to have her toes amputated. The gangrene got so bad that they had no choice. It left her severely deconditioned because they delayed management to see if it would work. Thank God they sought real help in time, and now with rehabilitation, she's walking again. Took her 3 years and the worse time of her life to prove it wrong though.
How did you feel before the beam ray? And really, what does having an atypical gland on your prostate mean? Nada. Sure it might mean you have prostate cancer, but chances are, it doesn't mean a thing. And even if you remove those so called atypical glands when you in fact have prostate cancer you don't really do anything because they're not exactly the cancer cells, they're just indications to monitor closely whether in fact you have cancer.
Now I'm not an expert here, I could be talking lots of trash, but one thing I know for sure, what's unjust is just arbitrarily claiming something which you didn't really prove.
Good argument
Too bad the anonymous chicken isn't listening.
It is still a posibility, even though my friend lost his son.
I am the one earlier that stated about having a friend, who's son was dieing of cancer. He choose not to try the device, and decided to try the treatment. His son died last week, at the age of 18. I am not here to state that the machine would or would not have worked, but I really wished he would have tried. The person who told me about it was a succuss, and his cancer was located in the Liver. This gentleman was out of options, and took the radio treatment as a last hope. It did work. I can't think of his name at this time, but he is from Chambersburg Pa. I will try to speak with him again soon, and ask if I can put his name and number on this site. Take care all, and just please say a short prayer for my friend and his family. Thank you.
I'm sorry to hear that
Cancer is always hard on its victims and their families.
But anecdotal evidence has very little weight in science. If beam ray proponents are really confident about their treatment, they should subject it to clinical trials. Refusing to do so seems highly suspicious to me.
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